The Road To Wellness

Rule #1: Never, I repeat, never eat at Chipotle. Ever.

Well, duh. Nobody is stupid enough to think that Chipotle is healthy. But the actual numbers make me wish I could hurl up every single burrito I've ever consumed over the past 6 years (mainly due to Lil'M, thankyouverymuch). Check this shit out:

Exhibit A - Burrito with rice, black beans, carnitas, tomatoes, cheese, sour cream, and guacamole.

Calories = 1352 (ONE-THOUSAND THREE HUNDRED AND FIFTY TWO......HOLY SHIT)
Fat = 63g (Shut up, Jared. Just shut up.)
Cholesterol = 136mg (My doctor would have a heart attack just thinking of me eating this burrito.)
Sodium = 3801mg (Quadruple by-pass, anyone?)

You've just got to be kidding me.

In order to burn that shit off, you could walk on the treadmill, uphill, for at least 2 hours or have 5 hours of "vigorous" sex (info per Calorie-Count.com). I feel sore just thinking about it.

I'm going to go have some celery now.